THIS WEEK IN REFLECTION
Monday started off with a weird vibe because our ASL professor didn’t show up. First, I wondered if he got too involved in Super Bowl celebrations (I forgot this event happened until it was over). But then, because we had been studying how to sign stories involving car accidents, I started to worry that he was in an accident and said so. I left the class to grab the head of the interpreting side of the department, and she used the time to let us ask questions about future classes. My question pertained to professionalism and etiquette at d/Deaf events. We left after thirty minutes for what is normally a two-hour class, so I got home and did chores, sat with Kitty, etc. When the ASL professor saw us Wednesday, he apologized and explained what happened, and also said there was a rumor he was in a car accident. That’s totally my bad, LOL.
Tuesday was Valentine’s Day. Do the rest of you celebrate that? I never know what all holidays everyone has in their countries. Nick and I never do anything on Valentine’s, but this year we moved date night to that evening (it’s a pretty flexible thing anyway) and then went home and ate treats (Entenmann’s devil’s food cake donuts for me, mint Oreos for him) and watched My Big Fat Greek Wedding. That may surprise you. However, I had been telling my spooky movie club just last week that I don’t watch other movie genres anymore because they make me feel bad, especially romance. That’s right; despite having a lovely husband and being so in love, romance movies make me feel awful. We’ll never be that hot, have that much drama, have such fancy jobs (I think “businessman” and “something in magazines” are popular), chase each other to an airport, etc. My Big Fat Greek Wedding seems like really normal people getting used to and falling in love with each other. The only part I hate is the end when their daughter says she doesn’t want to go to Greek school, she wants to be in Brownies. And her mom replies, “I know. I know. But I promise you this: You can marry anybody you want.” Lady, how are those even related??? I should turn the movie off as soon as they are married, but whatever.
Something shifted on Friday, though. I struggled on the written portion of my ASL midterm, and then when it was my turn to record the signing portion, I accidentally hit the glasses on my face. I didn’t lose my cool, which is good, because we’ve been learning about intrapersonal control in Interpreting class. Basically, you may be screaming on the inside, but your face is neutral. And yet, I couldn’t get myself together that day. I went home and switched into sweat pants and a hoodie. And yet, when the Linguistics professor asked what the pronoun in a sentence was, I raised my hand and said “old woman.” He said, “No, it’s not,” and I’m pretty sure I died inside.
It did get better Saturday morning when I visited with Cupcakes & Machetes on video. She helped me with a homework project (I’ll share more next week and give you a chance to weigh in) and also about what’s been going on in life. We definitely need to get together more often on video so we can talk. Texting just doesn’t have the same effect!
THIS WEEK’S BLOG POST
Thanks again to Hachette Go for sending me an ARC of It’s Always Been Ours by Jessica Wilson. Based on your comments, it sounds like while Wilson’s book was written with Black women in mind as the audience, but appeals to a larger readership. In fact, I would argue that seeing how white supremacy works in the diet industry helps all readers who are allies challenge and dismantle such a system. I know some folks are starting with delegitimizing the Body Positivity movement, which caters to young, white, able-bodied, straight women with self-confidence issues.
NEXT WEEK’S BLOG POST
I can almost hear Bill @ The Australian Legend saying, “Finally!” A while back I read Tracks: A Woman’s Solo Trek across 1700 Miles of Australian Outback by Robyn Davidson. Published in 1980, and written about events in the late 70’s, Davidson’s book frustrated me, but in ways that also challenged me to acknowledge that Davidson’s honesty at put her at risk of being reviled, and I think she knew that. Review Wednesday.
BOOKS I BOUGHT
Books Bought Since January 2023: 0
BOOKS ADDED TO THE TBR PILE
None.
As always love your honesty about your ups and downs – and love how you have positive strategies for handling the downs, even if it’s sometimes just going with it as best you can.
We don’t tend to “do” Valentine’s Day though we often acknowledge it. This year we went out with our son the night before because V-Day was the last night before we left to return home and we have a dining with him on our last night tradition. However, I don’t think his partner would have been too pleased – as generous as she is – if we’d taken him away that night (even though with two kids they were not doing anything very special.) So, on the actual last night, we just stayed in and ate up the leftovers in the fridge. I remember enjoying My Big Fat Greek Wedding – loud and joyful as I recollect – though I don’t remember much more than that. Your point about romances is well made, though I tend to just watch them – when I do – as fantasy rather than as aspirational.
I look forward to your review of Tracks and will do my best to comment. I think you are right about Davidson. I don’t think she cares a lot about “being liked”. She’s driven to follow her own drum as they say.
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Ha, as for downs, today I’m quite trembly. I had to present what is called an ABC story in class, and this afternoon I have a linguistics quiz. In between, I’ve just been rattling my bones all over. Trembling is new to me in the last year or so, and I’m rather discouraged trying to navigate it. Exposure therapy is supposed to help, but I just can’t seem to get my brain on board.
The main things most folks remember about My Big Fat Greek Wedding is the dad puts Windex on every ailment, and the aunt yelling, “ONE BIG ONE! ONE BIG ONE!” as she plucks a chin hair out of her sister’s chin.
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Oh, I’m sorry Melanie. I hope it settles down. I’ve only had one period in my life of such trembling- it was over 40 years ago, but I still remember the feeling vividly. I thought I was going to fall apart. Fortunately, with the help of a very kind counsellor, I got through that period but it was not pleasant. I’m glad you have a partner and others there to support and wrap their aims around you.
Thanks ie My big fat Greek wedding – I remember none of that, but I did see it when it came out, which was a little while ago now!
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I’m hoping the trembling goes away just as easily is it came!
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I hope so too.
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We buy flowers and sometimes chocolates for ourselves and the other one on Valentine’s Day because it helps us get through the long, cold slog of February.
I got an offer for a copy of It’s Always Been Ours and accepted because I liked what I’d read about it here.
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Oh, I’m so glad my review made a difference Jeanne! After I posted my review here, I made sure to share it to Goodreads, Amazon, and The StoryGraph. I only do that with ARCs, though, because I’m hoping to promote a good authors.
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We don’t do Valentine’s day either. Not much of a fan of romcoms myself because they tend to reinforce white patriarchal heteronormativity. However, I have seen a couple gay romcoms, most recently Bros, that were utterly delightful to watch and absolutely do not end in marriage.
Sorry you had a such a tough week. Glad your professor was ok. I hope you are enjoying the weekend!
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I never see a rom com in which they are struggling financially or with health, etc., unless we’re talking that awful JoJo Moyes story in which the guy who uses the wheelchair decides to kill himself so he’s not a burden to the woman who loves him. *big huge eyeroll*
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Ah yes, I get what you mean. Even “poor” people in romcoms aren’t actually poor and ableism runs rampant. Maybe when you are done with school you could write a movie script for a more inclusive romance? I would love to see it!
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Maybe! For my MA thesis, I wrote a romance novella that included mental health challenges. I should revisit that. It’s only been, oh, 15 years.
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Oooh, yes, put that on your miles long to do list! 🙂
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We don’t do much for Valentines Day, just exchange cards. It’s a commercial holiday, for kids and those who are newly in love, IMO. Although I do like looking at all the pretty pink and purple hand towels and stuff at Target, LOL.
I think you handled the week’s ups and downs very well! It’s hard to be out there learning and doing stuff. Good for you!
I remember loving My Big Fat Greek Wedding when it came out. I had a BIG crush on John Corbett when he was in Northern Exposure.
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Ha, yes, he was in Northern Exposure and then in Sex and the City. I don’t see him crop up all over the place, but when he does appear, it’s for a long, memorable time.
Come to think of it, emphasizing Valentine’s Day with kids feels pure evil. They’re the least experienced and most sensitive about exploring love and romance!
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It’s funny, my son exchanged valentines with his classes up until 5th grade, when he said “yeah we don’t do that anymore, it gets awkward.” 😂
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Your kid is astute! LOL, what a cutie.
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Rob and I don’t go crazy on Valentine’s Day either. For this one, he made steak quesadillas, and we played a video game together for a while and then went our separate ways for the night. No presents. I think if you’ve been together for a long time, the novelty of Valentine’s Day wears off. I like celebrating our anniversary instead. I’m glad that we took the time to chat! That was a great start to the day and we definitely should do it more often. ❤
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We typically never do anything, so moving date night to Valentine’s Day was low effort. We typically forget our anniversary, lol. My mom calls to remind both of us.
I’m so glad we talked, too! Actually, we talked for over 2 hours and I did not run out of introvert energy, which says a lot.
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I was very impressed! I noticed the time and was wondering how you were fairing but I also know that you’ll just tell me. 🙂
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I was having a nice time! When I’m with you, I also do not feel like I’m carrying the conversation. Sometimes I hang with people who are more introverted than I am, or can’t do the “song and dance” of an extrovert, so I feel like I’m coming up with all the topics, questions, etc.
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I’m glad! I was having a good time too. Those are frustrating conversations. I will give it the ol’ college try but if I’ve started a few topics and I’m not getting anything, I will politely excuse myself and leave. =/
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I have a bizarre history of “one year friends,” i.e. I get really close to someone for a year and then it dawns on me that I’m carrying the whole relationship and I bounce, causing the other person to be massively confused because I was oh-so supportive of their entire life before.
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Good for you to realize that though and bounce. Dani has a friend like that, and she finally let go and is much happier not having to deal with her and her drama. Life is too short for people who are self-centered.
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I can see Dani trying to make a friendship work for ages because she cares so much.
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Truth! So when she finally gives up, it says something about that person.
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Your Valentine’s Night sounds lovely! Aaron and I always get a little treat for each other, and then we celebrate by having a nice dinner with our kids, where we give them some little treats too. They get super excited by it (any holiday really) so it’s definitely kept the fun alive for us that way.
Both Aaron and I hate football, and we too didn’t realize the game was on until it was over – oh well!
The fact that you started a rumor in your class is hilarious!
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I didn’t mean to be a rumor generator, LOL. Typically I avoid rumors and gossip at all costs. Do your kids do Valentine’s cards at school?
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My oldest did this year, my youngest’s teacher told us we could do them the night before Valentines Day and I was like ‘yah not going to happen’
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Valentine’s Day is a thing here, but I don’t really know anyone who marks it (unless it happens to coincide with a birthday or an anniversary). A couple from my old church used to put on a games night around Valentine’s Day with an unwritten “this is in case anybody is feeling lonely and left out” rationale, which I always thought was very thoughtful – but those are the only Valentine’s things I’ve ever been to. I do often buy myself chocolate or flowers when they’re discounted the day after, though!
Sorry you had such a rough week – I hope things are looking up now.
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Yes, that day-after candy is so tempting! This is the first Valentine’s Day I can think of in our 17 years that we did anything. We’re just not really into, but I think it helped me to have a special night just to break up some of the school week. It’s very kind that people made a space for folks who don’t have a date on Valentine’s Day and do care, to a degree, that they are alone.
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Valentines Day was a big deal in my house this year but solely for the kids. Cards and chocolate and parties at school, that kind of thing. This year their school has been emphasizing ways to be kind in February so Valentines was part of that. I don’t think they see it as a romantic thing at all. Peter and I used to make pizza together every Valentines but this year I had to work and the kids were all wound up so it was a pretty ordinary night in our home!
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I love the comment Laila left about how her son hit 5th grade and said they don’t do Valentine’s cards anymore because it gets “awkward.” I remember feeling miserable at school when everyone was showing off as best they could on Valentine’s Day, and then one year Biscuit started sending me gifts to my class, so everyone would see me get it, and left her present anonymous. I looked like hot stuff!
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So far the rule has always been that if you give Valentines cards out you must give them out to everyone in the class. I’m not sure my kids yet associate the day with romance at all but I’m sure as they get older that will change and that awkwardness will come. My high school used to do a matchmaking form where you filled out a bunch of questions and then you got a machine printout of who in the school you were most compatible with. It always felt really embarrassing.
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OMG, I remember that matchmaking thing! I think I filled it out a few times, and then it was like “to see your results, pay $$. Ope, never mind, lol.
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It was huge at our school! I can’t believe I paid money for it!
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The only question I really needed was “Do you like boys in leather pants, yes or no.”
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Hahaha! But what’s your answer??
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Oh, fer sher we’re doing the leather pants.
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😂
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We do Valentine’s Day in the UK but we don’t bother in our house. Well, my husband trekked up the high street to the pound shop and got me a load of cough sweets …
I have had that shaking thing with my anxiety, only quite infrequently and at times of high anxiety. It’s horrible so I hope it goes away. I think mindfulness and breathing have helped me with it.
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The shaking exacerbates everything because then you try to pick something up and fumble it, or you walk too close to the wall when taking a corner and run into the corner, etc.
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Yes, or my speciality: throw your cup of tea down yourself / up the stairs …
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